how to deal with embarrassment

Don’t  you  just  love  humiliation?  I  am  the  ruler  of  being  mortified.  In  fact,  it  happens  to  me  so  often  that  I  barely  blush  anymore.  I  can  count  on  embarrassing  things  to  happen  to  me  almost  daily.  Some  instances  are  worse  than  others  of  course,  but  all  in  all  I  lead  a  pretty  humiliating  life.  Are  you  clumsy?  Socially  awkward?  Anxiety  ridden?  Do  you  blurt  things  out?  Go  off  on  a  tangent?  If  so,  you  can  probably  relate  to  this  problem.  Being  so  embarrassing  use  to  really  embarrass  me!  However,  I  think  I’ve  found  the  answer  to  overcoming  the  inevitable.  Enjoy  the  following  tools  I  use  to  deal  with  humiliation.

Announce the embarrassment. Make a joke about it before anyone else can.   What I did recently was ridiculous, but fresh and original. I showed up to do wedding makeup for a client with a very strange mark on my nose.   I got a spray tan the day before and slept with a Breathe Right strip on that night. It wasn’t until I woke up in the morning that it occurred to me, when I take this thing off, the tan is coming with it. All the makeup in the world couldn’t truly camouflage the mark it left behind. I felt the best thing to do was to make an announcement to the crowd before we began our day. “Good morning everyone! No, this is not a new contouring look I’m trying out. I am,   in fact, an idiot. I swear I won’t make you look like this. Thanks for your understanding.” Moving on.

Pretend nothing is happening as it’s happening and the first chance you get, kill it, bury it and black it out like it never happened. I really hate first impressions. Generally, I make terrible ones. I have all the best intentions on making a good one. I will fixate on it the entire day, planning out my behavior to ensure pleasantry, and I still fail . Upon meeting my friend’s new girlfriend, something I wanted to go really well, I said this, “You look really nice with your hair up. And I don’t mean nice like it looks good I mean you look friendly. Like not a bitch or anything. You know how some girls look sometimes with the sharp haircut when it’s down.” *breaks into nervous laughter* Did I just say that? “That’s not how I meant it. I don’t mean it how it sounds. My parents think I have a social disorder. I’m sorry, I should be on meds. What I mean is you look like a nice girl, I’m a nice girl. Was. A nice girl. Before I said all this. Do you need a drink?” No? You hate me already? It’s okay. I deserve it *Laughs*

Break into a nervous laugh and endure the pain. “I’m calling you to talk about this once and once only,” I said to my sister upon leaving the grocery store. I had just slipped and fell inside the store. When trying to regain my balance I leaned on, and knocked over, an entire display of cakes. When trying to get up to run, I slipped again and fell forward.   I crawled into the aisle as people gasped and camera phones flashed. I hid at the end-­‐cap as they called for cleanup over the intercom. I waited. Then, I continued my search for peanut butter and purchased it. As if it never happened. Selective amnesia. I fall a lot. Sometimes people get pictures of it. At my friends bachelorette, I went to lean against what I thought was a wall for a picture, it was actually a   photo drop curtain that separated the lobby from the bathroom corridor at the casino we were at. The fall was so loud people came running to see. I pretended it was as normal as I could and laughed for the cameras. Embarrassment avoidance.  We can all survive ourselves in this ever embarrassing life. Even when we are captured in stranger’s photos or made into an unexpected YouTube star, we can survive. (That hasn’t yet happened). With beating people to the punch, humor, and avoidance, we will all be okay.



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More about Erika Lauren

Erika Lauren is a Boston born French girl spending her days as a workin girl and dog mom, and her nights as a nocturnal writer. She's a content creator for The Haute Mess, XOJane, and Email:

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