french lessons: when in france do as the french girls do

So… Are you having a hard time dating, losing weight, epitomizing your fashion board on Pinterest? Yeah, me too, but I have a solution! After a few trips to France, I learned something valuable. There is no girl like the French girl. They walk, talk, and breathe a certain je ne sais quoi. Follow this guide of French lessons: when in France do as the French girls do and tell me what you think!

1) They are impeccably, yet effortlessly put together and no one is without style. 

Young or old, I have never seen a French woman not put together. They are always with the tights, the scarf, the jacket. They always dress imperfectly perfect, like a page in a high fashion street-style magazine. I always admire their beautiful yet simple makeup, their fuss-free hair, and their spotless fresh attire. Of course there are also the complimentary accessories to die for. The perfect belt, watch, or bracelet is always in sight. French girls always use a “less is more” approach. They don’t wear all their jewelry at once or a ring on every finger, just what will make them sparkle. Take a minute to go through your closet and toss anything tattered or ragged for starters. (I know some things are hard to let go off, but the skirt that you use sharpie to cover up the bleach stain with… Toss it.)

Keep in mind that you don’t need to replace everything you toss and have this huge selection of clothing. You just need some quality pieces that you take good care of. Buy cute but comfortable shoes (hint: they will cost more than $60) and collect staple pieces for your long-term wardrobe. Make sure your makeup is done in a fresh and clean way (think concealer, mascara, blush and lipgloss) and take a comb through your hair (or don’t! They don’t!)  Above all else, own your look with the upmost confidence. Fashion is an attitude.

2) They save eye contact for their friends and lovers.

What I quickly realized was that a huge difference between French girls and myself was that I smiled and made eye contact and they did not. Well, at least not with me or any other stranger on the street! This mysterious can’t-be-bothered disposition almost put me off at first, but I quickly followed suite. If you want to blend in while vacationing there, follow this easy rule of a straight face and no eye contact unless spoken to.

However, when they are out with their friends or on a date they DO make eye contact. Unbreakable eye contact. They are the most flirtatious conversationalists I have ever seen. I was on a date myself but couldn’t stop watching French girls on their 10pm dinner dates. I think it’s a great reminder to put your phone down on your dates and actually be on your date. Look at your man! He’s freakin hot!

3) They move their ass.

I don’t mean dancing. I’m sure they dance just fine but what I’m talking about is the fact that they get up and go. These girls don’t take the car a mile up the street for a frozen pizza and beer to go back to their couches. The walk, everywhere.

They don’t need to go to the gym because being active is a part of their daily life without any effort. It’s not until I visit that I come home and actually pay attention to what is in walking distance from my house. I realized I have a great Mexican restaurant 1.2 miles up the street and now when I want margaritas and queso, guess what? I walk there! Because it will burn off seven chips! It’s no wonder they are able to eat bakery and drink wine all day long and still look thin. They can even walk a mile without wheezing. #lifegoals

4) They take their time.

What I really love about the French (and what you should really take away from their culture) is that they take their time. Girlfriends meet outside over a cup of espresso and you can see that they are truly enjoying their time together. One is not on their phone, one is not in a rush, both are present in the moment and it is a beautiful sight.

When you go out to eat in France you will soon see that it is a long process. No one is going to hurry you up by dropping off your check. More often then not you will have to go up and ask for it an hour after you got your food. Try not to inhale your food like you do back home. When you get bread, don’t shove it down your throat while waiting for your entrée! It is meant to be eaten with your dinner, not before. Remember to slow down and enjoy and be present in the moment. After all you’re in France, and if you’re home, you’re living your one life.

5) They invest in sexiness.

Oooh la la oui oui oui. These girls spend 85% of their paychecks on lingerie and beauty. Yes. The lingerie shops are exquisite. I highly recommend that you buy a cute set, slip, or night gown while you’re over there. Then head right over to a pharmacy, an Yves Rocher, or Galeries Lafayette for some luxurious skin care necessities and perfume. I have friends that know me to check a bag on the way home just to bring home cleanser and face crème.

There is a reason French girls have a sexy reputation and it’s because they give a damn. They don’t come off like they give a damn, but they really freakin do. Their clothes are clean and nice. Underneath they are wearing perfume (most likely Chanel) and a matching bra and underwear set. They put eye crème and face crème on every night, wash with a milk cleanser every morning and they lotion up from head to toe with a crème for every limb of their body. Cellulite crème, bronzing crème, breast crème, hand crème, décolleté crème, foot crème, lip crème.  It all makes a difference in the end. When you take care of yourself that well, you’re never going to let anyone near you that would take care of you any less. That is sexy as hell.

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More about Erika Lauren

Erika Lauren is a Boston born French girl spending her days as a workin girl and dog mom, and her nights as a nocturnal writer. She's a content creator for The Haute Mess, XOJane, and Email:


    1. I love this! French women seem so effortlessly chic, but I suppose like anything that looks effortless actually requires a lot of work!

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